Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Helping Women in Developing Countries

I have applied to volunteer in a developing country, sharing my work of empowerment for women. I realized the first thing I need to do is get my head out of how things work in North America and learn what life is really like in developing countries. My current workshop was going to fall on deaf ears. Most women don't work outside the home, or in the same way women in North America go off to work every day. I needed to understand what the current culture was and adapt my teachings to that. My research open a window of huge discovery for me, one that I was truly not expecting. I discovered that women are still struggling to earn basic rights; rights that we have long taken for granted. I knew this in general terms, but never really looked at the consequences of this lack of equality. This was much bigger than I anticipated. Until now, my focus has been financially empowering women and wage equality, but I realized I had to understand and address total gender equality. So first I had to define total gender equality:

Gender equality means a society in which women and men enjoy the same:

· Access to education

· Rights and obligations in all areas of life

· Distribution of power and influence

· Reproductive health and rights

· Financial independence through work or entrepreneurship

· Opportunity to develop personal ambitions

· Autonomy to manage their own lives

One does not supersede or replace another. Each of these areas must be improved together. Think about when one takes on the desire for personal growth. It is not just in one area that will bring them success - success will come from growing:

· Mentally

· Physically

· Emotionally

· Spiritually

· Financially

In order to achieve total balance, all equalities must work together and become part of society in equal measure.

This article will be the first in a series, highlighting each equality issue on their own. All of them are part of the bigger picture of total equality. But we have to start with the first step. The following is, in my belief, the most crucial. This is where it needs to start. Sadly, I had no idea that the lack of the most basic rights of all was killing hundreds of thousands of women and children. I cannot believe how naive I was, thinking that the issue was simply birth control. I hope this article will in a minuscule way, rectify my lack of understanding and knowledge by bringing awareness to others.

1. Reproductive Health and Rights

Access to essential health supplies could save the lives of millions of women and children every year. Some 215 million women currently have an unmet need for family planning in developing countries. If this need were met, it would result in 53 million less unintended pregnancies and approximately 100,000 less maternal deaths every year. In March of 2012, a high-level commission was launched by UNICEF and UNFPA. They state, "The day of birth is the most dangerous day in the life of a woman and her child. The fact that women do not get the care they need during childbirth is the most brutal expression of discrimination against women. To prevent these tragic and unnecessary deaths is not only a humanitarian urgency of highest priority, but a key investment for social and economic development." (For more information on the Commission, visit http://www.everywomaneverychild.org/resources/un-commission-on-life-saving-commodities )

In another article, a UN report reveals 500,000 women in developing countries die each year as a result of pregnancy. Women in the world's least developed countries are 300 times more likely to die during childbirth or because of their pregnancy than those in the UK and other similarly developed countries.

The death toll is more than half a million women a year, according to Unicef, the UN children's emergency fund. Some 70,000 who die are girls and young women aged 15 to 19. Although it is the subject of one of the millennium development goals, the death toll is not going down. In the developing world, a woman has a 1-in-76 risk of dying because of pregnancy or childbirth in her lifetime. In developed countries, that risk is only one in 8,000. Deaths of newborns have also received too little attention, the report says. A child born in one of the least developed countries is nearly 14 times more likely to die within the first 28 days of life than one in an industrialised country such as the UK.

The reasons are multiple, according to Unicef`s annual state of the world`s children report on maternal and newborn health. "The root cause may lie in women's disadvantaged position in many countries and cultures and in the lack of attention to, and accountability for, women's rights," it says. "Saving the lives of mothers and their newborns requires more than just medical intervention," said Ann Veneman, Unicef's executive director. "Educating girls is pivotal to improving maternal and neonatal health and also benefits families and societies."

Something we take for granted - the choice to plan our families - does not exist in some of these developing countries. The women are not only denied the medical attention they deserve, but the education to know they deserve it.

Equality for reproductive health and rights is the foundation for future generations. This isn't just about birth control, or women choosing whether to have children or how many; this is about saving lives.

Empowerment begins with knowledge. It moves forward with action. I feel blessed that I can share my expertise and take a small part in the movement of gender equality. And my first step is to gain the knowledge so I can move forward and share.

Please join me and share this.



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Friday, July 27, 2012

Are You Dreaming of an Island Wedding?

Introduction

What immediately comes to mind when you think of a having your wedding somewhere in paradise? Are you one of the future brides who is turned away by the thought of having a traditional ceremony with 250+ guests, a half- empty church, requests to take thousands of the same photos and last, but not least, an overly crowded reception hall where you need to say hello to relatives you never knew existed? All for the price of $25,000+? Well, if this is you, say no more. I've heard this all before from couples, especially recently engaged women, and I am excited to announce that you can make your dreams a reality easier than you may realize. What should come to mind when thinking of jetting off to the white sands to say your "I do's" is affordability and intimacy. There is nothing more affordable than traveling to your wedding destination while being minutes away from your honeymoon villa. And there is nothing more intimate than hosting your ceremony on a private beach with your best friends and closest family watching you and your mate commit to each other forever.

Magen's Bay, St Thomas, USVI

According to National Geographic in 2011, Magen's Bay located on the north end of the Caribbean Island, St Thomas, US Virgin Islands was rated one of the top ten beaches in the world. Magen's Bay is a pristine natural reserve with a public beach that offers potential wedding destination lovers lush tropical scenery and white sands to say their vows. And at no extra charge, the beach offers gorgeous sunrises and sunsets along with stunning views of the crystal turquoise waters. What makes this beach one of the perfect destinations for a beach wedding is the lack of current and waves because of the topography of the bay. A wise choice for any couple as Magen's Bay is fast becoming one of the most requested beaches for wedding ceremonies.

St Thomas is an affordable solution for a beach wedding and can serve as one of the best investments of your life. There are many resources out there to help assist you in making your plans including consultants, dedicated coordinators and travel planners. A coordinator can assist from everything from marriage license application, courthouse fees, certified minister, and any other questions you have about marrying on the island. In the end, the investment for an island wedding can be way less than that boring same ole traditional wedding that society has been accustomed to. Why not have an island wedding? It can be the most intimate moment of your life.



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Authentic Designer Handbags

For the best authentic designer handbags you need look no farther than online for many of the best choices and arrays of gorgeous handbags. You can find many beautiful styles and colors and still stay within your budget. There are many fashion websites online that work hard to make available some of the most luxurious handbags made by awesome designers.

You can purchase them pre-owned or new and will have hundreds of styles available to you at very reasonable prices. There is no reason why you have to pay exorbitant prices for a beautiful purse these days.

Many online luxury handbag stores are committed to bringing their customers top of the line products in an honest manner. You can expect to receive 100 percent authentic handbags if you take the time to search the best online stores. Even if you have a taste for the best handbags in the world such as Gucci or Louis Vuitton you can find them at discounted prices as well.

You can find thousands of items on sale and that will suit your fashion tastes. Every woman wants to be fashionable but cannot always afford it. These authentic handbag sites are there to help you out and offer affordable ones. You can even find authentic Prada bags at a great price on some of the fashion blogs.

You will want to be sure that what you are buying ia the authentic brand so that you are not ripped off. Many of these bags have to go through a 13 point inspection so that you can be assured you are getting authentic items. They cover all of the well -known elements as well as lesser known ones to be sure you receive what you desire and pay for. If you visit a reputable site they will stand behind their bags 100 percent and if you aren't satisfied give you a refund. You can also get free shipping on many of these authentic handbags online.

So take some time today and look at the options you have for authentic handbags online. You will be amazed at all of the choices you have at your fingertips. You will certainly find something to suit any style and match any outfit. In a nutshell handbags are a vital accessory that accents any wardrobe and designer ones are even better. Look online today and pick yours out. What are you waiting for?



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Marion Woodman Named on Watkins' Spiritual Leaders List for 2012

Once an English teacher, Marion Woodman is one of this year spiritual leaders according to Watkins. Woodman is an author, international lecturer, Jungian analyst, poet, and feminist movement leader who have garnered both praise and criticism for her work. As an author she has guided thousands on a path of spiritual enlightenment, which is why she has been recognized this year on Watkins list of Spiritual Leaders.

Her books have sold more than 500,000 copies, including Dancing in the Flames, which was released in 1996 and co-authored with Elinor Dickson. This book describes the dark and powerful Black Goddess who has been a key force in world history. She has the ability to embody the energy of chaos and creativity, creation and destruction, death and rebirth. Images of her have been missing in the Western world for centuries until now. Thanks to Woodman and Dickson this book provides closure to this subject and a new level of consciousness, and wisdom in their approach of this book.

In 2001 Woodman co-authored Coming Home to Myself: Reflections for Nurturing a Woman's Body and Soul, which in addition to being an amazingly well written book that is described as a "rite of passage" that soothes the soul. This book reflects on a women's journey through life and includes what Woodman describes as "moments" in time and Mellick; her co-author describes as "adaptation" of our life. The authors use these terms to refer to poem-like verses that they eloquently infuse within their chapters. For example in Chapter 3: The Body, the authors shares with us the following...

A body whose wisdom

has never been honored

does not trust

easily an animal with a crazy trainer

Learns crazy habits,

runs wild.

When we take ourselves seriously,

We accept the responsibility

Of knowing and loving our body.

Give your body an hour a day.

If it's not worth an hour a day,

there's nothing

your body can tell you.

and not much

anyone else can do.

After a two-year battle with uterine cancer that forced her to close her Toronto practice, Woodman, reflects on her illness and wrote her next book. Bone: Dying into Life, which is a book that describes her healing process and includes a pungent description of her spiritual struggle as well as her choice to use alternative as well as conventional medicine. For anyone who is curious about the use alternative medications or know someone who is going through the tough battle of cancer; perhaps you may want to consider reading this book. It may help you gain a better understanding of the experience.

Woodman is one of the few women who can plainly yet poetically tell us like it is. Her spiritual gift to all of us is her ability to live life to the fullest and on her own terms. When asked what her thoughts on aging and death are, she stated in an interview with Jesse Kornbluth for a PBS Special, "Life is magnificent. It's the now that matters."

When considering Woodman's words of wisdom, perhaps we should put her words into practice. Sometimes we all have a tendency to move so fast that we don't slow down long enough to enjoy the here and now. The wind blowing in the trees, the smell of a flower, the sound of a child laughing; but we can learn. We can learn to enjoy life as it comes, moment by moment, and certainly we can learn to begin to start focusing more on the "NOW."



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Tuesday, July 24, 2012

How to Find Venues For Your Wedding

Your Decorative Budget

Many people choose inexpensive venues in order to cut cost. However, you may want to consider how much money it might take to spruce up the event space. For instance an event hall might cost you only $1k, however the walls are drab and the floor might be hideous. While an other event hall might cost you $2500 however the room's own decorative elements enhance the space. If the room is semi formal you might end up spending less on decorations.

Extras

Some venues offer you a low price but you are just getting the event space only. However when you compare the extras included in their rental fee, you are spending more. For instance, in your search you might find that one venue offers $4000 for the venue space, however, the there is a rental fee for chairs and tables. Sometimes people need to consider that hotels often have set ups especially designed for weddings. These set up includes table and chair decorations.

Parking

Though some spaces boast about size and parking, you might want to take a special look into the logistics. If your event is on a weekend and the venue has several events going on at the same time, you might need to inquire about parking capacities. Also you need to know how accessible the parking lot might be for handicap persons. Its good to know if the parking lot is secured or will security be an additional expense.

Food and Beverage

Many venues have a list of preferred vendors. Make sure you contact these vendors to for pricing information. Then compare these totals with others. Instead of plated meals, it might be cost effective to do buffet style dinners. Find out

if they are offering any deals or specials. Also if you are seeking caterers, check out their foods as well. Inquire about venues they suggest and see if they could cut you a deal for selecting one of the venues they are in contract with.

This is a very clever tactic!

Audio Visual

You or your event planner need to physically go to the venue to check out the audio visual equipment. Some venues require a certified technician to work the equipment. Once the venue is selected a trial run with the technician is a necessary must. Don't assume that if the venue states they have audio visual accommodations, that it is included in the package pricing. Inquire about the equipment and make sure that your request can be accommodated by the venue.

Some venues charge hundreds of dollars for using their a/v equipment. You might come out considerably cheaper by bring your own equipment or renting from an outside source.



This news article is brought to you by CELEBRITY GOSSIP NEWS - where latest news are our top priority.

How to Find Venues For Your Wedding

Your Decorative Budget

Many people choose inexpensive venues in order to cut cost. However, you may want to consider how much money it might take to spruce up the event space. For instance an event hall might cost you only $1k, however the walls are drab and the floor might be hideous. While an other event hall might cost you $2500 however the room's own decorative elements enhance the space. If the room is semi formal you might end up spending less on decorations.

Extras

Some venues offer you a low price but you are just getting the event space only. However when you compare the extras included in their rental fee, you are spending more. For instance, in your search you might find that one venue offers $4000 for the venue space, however, the there is a rental fee for chairs and tables. Sometimes people need to consider that hotels often have set ups especially designed for weddings. These set up includes table and chair decorations.

Parking

Though some spaces boast about size and parking, you might want to take a special look into the logistics. If your event is on a weekend and the venue has several events going on at the same time, you might need to inquire about parking capacities. Also you need to know how accessible the parking lot might be for handicap persons. Its good to know if the parking lot is secured or will security be an additional expense.

Food and Beverage

Many venues have a list of preferred vendors. Make sure you contact these vendors to for pricing information. Then compare these totals with others. Instead of plated meals, it might be cost effective to do buffet style dinners. Find out

if they are offering any deals or specials. Also if you are seeking caterers, check out their foods as well. Inquire about venues they suggest and see if they could cut you a deal for selecting one of the venues they are in contract with.

This is a very clever tactic!

Audio Visual

You or your event planner need to physically go to the venue to check out the audio visual equipment. Some venues require a certified technician to work the equipment. Once the venue is selected a trial run with the technician is a necessary must. Don't assume that if the venue states they have audio visual accommodations, that it is included in the package pricing. Inquire about the equipment and make sure that your request can be accommodated by the venue.

Some venues charge hundreds of dollars for using their a/v equipment. You might come out considerably cheaper by bring your own equipment or renting from an outside source.



This news article is brought to you by ADVANCED DATING ADVICE - where latest news are our top priority.

For Women Only: Fabulous Hair Care Tips

The hair is so important to your physical looks. It can flatter or alter your personality. Thus, you have to take good care of your sensitive tresses. Maintain a nourishing diet and try to practice a hygienic routine. This will help you solve common hair problems such as dandruff, balding, thinning hair,and untimely graying.

Here are some practical hair tips that you can add to your daily hair care regimen:

  • Never deviate from a healthy lifestyle. Also, stay away from alcoholic beverages, smoking. and too much stress. Eat healthy foods. Get sufficient sleep, and indulge in moderate exercise on a regular basis.

  • Be selective with your hair styling products such as hair sprays and gels. Do not use those with excessive alcohol content because these cause your hair to get dry. Do not apply these substances directly onto your scalp.

  • When you use the hair dryer, adjust it to cool setting since hot air can damage your locks. Do not use the device on just one area for a long time. Maintain a considerable space from your hair. It is better to dry the hair with the towel, or you can simply let the dampness to dry naturally. Use your fingers lightly to straighten out any knots.

  • Use a swimming cap to protect your hair from chlorine. Take a shower and wet your hair so that it will serve as your hair's guard against this chemical. If you do not wear a cap, make sure to shampoo and use a conditioner right after swimming. Also, avoid too much sunlight while swimming.

  • Do not use a comb or brush with sharp edges. Instead opt for a brush with soft bristles made of animal mane. It causes less damage especially to fragile hair. Dry your hair completely before brushing. The hair is most delicate when it is still wet. Use one stroke in brushing which is from the top going downwards.

  • Purchase shampoos and conditioners that is right for your hair. Keep in mind that it is important to shampoo since this eliminates dirt, hair oil, dead cells, and any chemicals from styling gels.

  • The proper way of shampooing is to rinse the hair before applying a moderate amount of shampoo. Massage your hair and scalp with the fingertips using an outward direction. Wash thoroughly once more to remove the excess shampoo to prevent drying. You may wash as often as you prefer. However, the rule is to wash oily hair daily and dry hair three times each week. Try different brands occasionally to determine how your hair responds. Use a conditioner after shampooing to provide moisture and to give it an extra shine.

  • Be wary of hair "dressings" which are supposed to enhance the appearance of your hair. Dermatologists warn of possible serious irritation by using these products. In fact, hair stimulants simply spruce up the hair but do not promote its growth. Read the instructions and features carefully before using these hair miracle items.



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Female Exploitation Illustrations: 'Seperated Unity'

"... I don't know the reason but I always feel persecuted, whenever a person disturbs my area, I feel like it's an attack on me. I learnt that word yesterday: I overheard my father pronouncing it from the dictionary, he spoke out the meaning... persecution."

(She pauses )

" Here, there are many birds, but they only come out in the morning. Once it's hot, they rest in the shade. My mother says they're like people, they're lazy!"

(She pauses)

"In school, my teacher knows how to use her GSM like a computer: Sometimes she sends letters & then my other teacher's phone rings!"

(She pauses)

"One day, I'm going to have a big house that I will have a big celebration in, with all my family. I've seen it before: Sometimes, I stop in the town centre & watch the TV. It has satellite & all the people sit on the ground & watch the TV. You can watch films, the men like to argue whenever football is on the TV. But I can't stay when they show other women, they have a time when you can see fashion but I must return to fetch water because my mother is sick. "

(She pauses)

"I don't know anywhere, this is my home. We have some farms around us but everywhere is bush. Sometimes snakes come to visit us but the neighbor's sons kill them, because our house are together."

(She pauses)

"Snake meat is good, they can sell it, it's very expensive. In the city, they like to eat python."

(She pauses)

"My brother is after me, then I have 2 sisters. They're very young, so I must take care of them a lot. My brother helps to clean the house. He can boil water & cook some food from the stove. But we only use that when my father is around. The kerosene is expensive, so we use the firewood that the traders sell us. They pass by every two weeks."

(She pauses)

"It doesn't matter if I don't go to school a lot, my mother says I have to be a woman so that they will find a man for marriage & provide for the family. We sleep together in one room, I'm waiting to make it better. They don't know because I don't tell them but one day when I'm going to get money, I'm going to build a new house for them & we will have smooth floor & windows & an iron door. They will think I'm rich because it's going to have a generator set & a ceiling fan & radio. My brother & sisters will have a big bed & radio. My mother will have her own TV, a new one, so she can watch all the fashion, in her bed."

(She pauses)

"My father came back yesterday but he returned in the afternoon. He works at the coast in the town, he collects rubbish & sells it. Whenever he comes back he always brings something along. We' have collected a wall clock, a teddy bear, a little table, even pots to cook. Yesterday, he brought some books with the dictionary. Daddy was a postman, the post office closed down & sacked him. When the war broke out, we lost everything. I was little, my brother was inside my mother's stomach when we ran away with my father, into the bushes. We were hiding from the militia. I still remember there were other families with us, all of us were crying. When anyone would hear something, we would all be quiet. Then when it would go again, we would cry again. We lived in the bush for 9 months, my brother was born there. All the families supported my mother & they prayed for my brother. They always said he was special, that he is a blessing to us. One of the men told me to watch after him because my brother will become our guardian."

(She smiles)

"After the war, we did not return, everywhere was burnt down & it was not safe so we returned to the coast. They formed a community there & this our home. My sisters were born here, they are twins. Some girls here have been taken far away, to the city. They are going to sell their body to buy food. Their mothers here are upset but they are feeding their children. One of them, I know, is from my class. She is 13, the rest are 15, maybe 17."

(She pauses)

"I haven't eaten since yesterday. I always get headaches & my stomach hurts. When we were hiding in the bush, we would eat big pigs & everyone would eat together. There was plenty food because there was no money, many animals & bush. We had a fire in the night and slept because the animals were afraid of fire. I can't give my body to a man & collect money for it. I am special. I wouldn't know how much to tell him to pay. My father is abused sometimes because he smells bad, when he returns from work, but they don't know he used to work in an office. He was a postman & he can read & write. He has finished school! Many who abuse him don't work, they just sit around all day & look at people everyday. My mother tells me to stay away from them... I don't like them!"

(She pauses)

"Money is bad: People kill each other for money. People steal & do bad things, all because of money. But I want money! So that I can have a lot, to buy my father an office again & a car. He will wear nice clothes & smell good all the time. And then I want to marry a gentleman. He will take care of me & treat me nice. I want many children & my brother & sisters will know them very well. And when they have their children, they will all play & grow up together."

(She smiles)

"I dream one dream & it always returns many nights: that I will be a queen of town & a very important lady. I will be on TV & not the one sitting on the ground. I will wear a long, royal dress & many jewels. I will provide work for all women & all the girls will be given many good meals every day, so they will not be hungry anymore. And they won't have to sell their body for a bad price. Because they're special, too. I will make a school for them, where they are taught to do anything they want & when they leave, they will become everything they want. I will make peace everywhere so that there will be no more war & nobody will have to live inside the bush. And they won't have to sell snakes for money or kill big pigs to eat. My mother will have a doctor visit her & treat her at home & she will become well & play with us. I won't be walking early in the morning before school to fetch water from the next town, again. I won't be carrying heavy jerrycans for 2 hours every day to my house, so that we can eat, drink, cook & bathe. I will buy a water pump, like they have, where I take water."

(She pauses)

She looks out into the bright, empty, dried-shrub-covered landscape, marked by a few Baobab trees, amid the scorching heat. In her hands, she's holding a little branch: She had been peeling at it ever since. She's clothed in rags: Her blouse is so dirty it's brown & her shorts are, in several places, patched up - her father's work. Resting against the wall of her home, she sits on the ground outside, in the shade; listening to the eagles vocalizing & watching as they glide through the sky, hardly flapping their wings for minutes. She looks at the poster on a wall, opposite her. It's a news article, tattered, with the bold headline 'SUPERSTAR: AFRICAN POP PRINCESS ON WORLD TOUR; PROMOTES OWN RURAL POVERTY ALLEVIATION SCHEME'. It's got a large image of a smiling adolescent girl in large sunglasses & designer clothes, holding a naked child & surrounded by local villagers cheering her. That must be what it's like when you've arrived! Next to the young girl is her jerrycan, ready for refilling from the next hour's walk.

She looks deeply at the image, gradually returning to her reality. Her stomach is still churning & her headache's worse.

"I know you understand what I mean." she says, still looking at the poster, in a heart-breaking tone. As she looks back out again, into the open, blazing-hot, barren wilderness, she mumbles quietly to herself:

"We are the same!"

The above writing is a work of fiction, based on real issues, to paint a picture of the combination of dire sociocultural & economic conditions that breed abject poverty & create the ecosystems necessary to torment & exploit rural girls, in the 21st century. Any resemblance of the characters to any people living or dead, is purely coincidental. The writing is composed in subtle forms of African vernacular English.



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A World Of Options In Women's Clothing

You probably already are aware of the wide variety of women's clothing available on the internet, as you probably are either a woman indulging yourself in online shopping-sprees or a man cringing in the living-room corner as your wife hogs the computer and the credit card.

But the wide variety of options isn't just about different aspects of a woman's wardrobe and body parts. And the options does not only address the style, price and specific items you are after. No, it is bigger than that.

Plus Size

Shopping for plus size clothes can be a hassle, not only due to a lack of availability since, lets face it folks, we are still living in a modern time that puts weird outfits on skinny skeletons and tries to sell it off as high fashion, so being big is really a widespread field and many women still feel a bit stigmatized going into a shop shamelessly advertising themselves as a plus size store.

Now, many women do not, and all the better for them, but if you are having issues with being confronted with judgmental looks, than the vast array of online options is the perfect place for you.

You will find full-on collections as well as carefully picked items with exclusivity stamped all over them. They will give you everything you need in accessories, from extravagant hats to precious jewelry.

They will even give you look-books to inspire you, with head-to-toe ideas for every season, and I guarantee you could even find a bikini here that will make you feel as beautiful as you are.

Tall Size

Now this is an even bigger issue since at least "big is beautiful" is a concept making a strong comeback. But if you are one of those unlucky souls not fitting into that range of "normal" length, then you already know how hard it is to find a decent shop in the regular mall.

You have to get them custom-made, which is a lot more expensive, if you do not want to walk out of the shop with jeans ending halfway up your calf's.

But online, the clothes presented to you are already custom-made, and they are made in lengths that will not make you feel like a space alien once you put them on. They have shorts, women's shoes that go well with that cocktail dress without accentuating your height even further.

The training gear they offer will not start to creep up in uncomfortable places and even if they shrink a little bit after the first wash, hey, they are made with a tall size person in mind, they are meant to shrink a little!

So there is so much more to clothes than just being an identity marker or a fashion statement, for some people shopping for women's clothing has never been the lust-filled experience they deserve. But that is all about to change.



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Monday, July 23, 2012

Violence Against Women - Do They Like/Encourage It?

There are various situations that result in violence against women. There is the type of violence that is what I would call "spontaneous", is an attack on any woman in the street.

That kind of violence is not what I will be dealing with, but the kind that manifests itself with results of hospital visits or the law officer's intervention.

Let me state upfront that I am against ALL forms of violence, whether it be political, child, IPV, verbal, economic or otherwise.

IPV [Intimate Partner Violence] is prevalent in all stratum of society. One's income streams does not exclude the gravity of the problem.

Some years ago my next door neighbour's son was married in a beautiful Hindu wedding ceremony. She was a stay-at-home wife typical of the tradition that obtained at the time.

Soon one could hear the sounds of beatings as if the wonder-bride was relegated to being a "tassa drum." This continued for some months until the wonder-bride jumped through the bedroom window during a beating, landed on the kitchen roof, and made good her escape. I have not laid my eyes on her since.

The causal factor in the relationship I later learnt was the gentleman's mother. His working in the grocery all day and the daughter-in-law not bowing to her mother-in-law's every whim and fancy had her "carrying news" on the wonder-bride. These tidbits the mother told her son of which he believed, hence the severe beatings.

A female calypsonian once used these lyrics in her ditty. "Dog does run away, cat does run away, so woman put some wheels on your heels". I endorse that point 100%. A woman is God designed and God created to be a HELPER for man. Not a servant but an equal partner to assist him and he her in THEIR journey across the lifespan.

I grew up in an era where male dominance was still being promoted. But my father said to us his offspring that our mother was the Queen of the home. At that time I did not sense it but it grew on me when I had my own home.

Some women that are in a IVP situation are bound in her space by the cultural patterns that obtain in their society. Who can she turn to if she vacates her space? But I say this the economic potential of these countries could explode once these women are freed from their chattel existence.

The major factor in the IVP thing is man's longing to be "macho". But that "macho" lifestyle goes against all forms of co-habitation.

I lived with a lady who bore four children for me who was in a IVP situation before we met. I later learnt from her during our many bedroom talks [she was afraid to speak elsewhere of it] of the many atrocities that was she submitted to.

I will draw one example from our journey together to illustrate how devastating an effect on a woman's psyche or for that matter anyone IVP effects.

I was a cigarette smoker at the time, and while lying on the bed together having a casual conversation I would obviously reach to the head-board to get my smoking paraphernalia. Every time I did this she would flinch. It took her about five years to release from her mind that whenever I raised my hand was not to hit her.

We underestimate as men the effect that IVP has on our ladies and by extension our offspring. This fighting to control is never healthy.

I once read a case history of a couple having problems and one night the husband choked and raped her in the presence of their 12 year-old son. He took up a poker and struck him on the head she got up and kicked him all over, grabbed her purse and boy an ran.

I sense you will say that women are IVP perpetrators too. It is on both sides of the divide, but it leans heavily in favour of the woman. Protect them and our children. I will write on female partner violence down the road

Time to stop the violence.



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Hair Removal Product Reviews

I am not ashamed to say I have looked at quite a lot of product reviews for that annoying condition of excessive hair. No matter if you are a man or a woman, in magazines and on television all you see are tense muscles perfectly accentuated by clean-shaven bodies.

The hairy chest of the Rock and roll eighties are definitely out of style, and as I grew tired of being mistaken for Chewbacca, I decided to do something about it. This is what I found.

For Men

There is a lot of efficient creams available online to support the sometimes quite painful experience of removing unwanted hair. Products strong enough that you simply have to apply the cream and let it fester at the cluster areas of your problem zones for a few minutes, and then you simply wipe it away, cream and hair in one swift swipe, and the thick bushes that kept creeping out of sleeves and collars are history.

The hassles of ingrown hair on the other hand is a more complicated matter whatever gender you belong to. But nowadays effective creams are available for that inconvenience as well, high on moisturizer and with giving a soothing sensation to your skin, that in turn makes it gentle enough to use on a daily basis.

There is also the possibility of specialized wax strips for men. The ones that contain cooling peppermint are to recommend but of course that varies depending on the company and the brand.

For Woman

Here the supply side of the chain is proportionally bigger, as you are offered not only products for different problem zones, but also products in tune with every type of different complexion. You can target your hairy areas with products specifically designed for dry, sensitive, oily or normal skin. Since this is something you will probably need to do on a regular basis, matching up your skin type with the right product is crucial.

The Brazilian Wax

The most effective proven method out there, this one is the unchallenged champion. Since the wax trickles down deep into the root canals of your body hair, it heats them up and makes it easier to get them up by the roots as you do the close-your-eyes-and-pull maneuver.

You can also find the natural warm wax in a variety of soothing extracts, with everything from eucalyptus to red grape to orange blossom. If you can stomach this, you could just as easily conduct this procedure in the confinement of your own home, but if the mere thought of it makes your hands tremble, you should either choose a different approach or consult with a professional.

Go The Gel Way

Natural Gel's are also a good compliment to removing unwanted hair. As you apply it to your body, your natural temperature makes it melt and then you simply wash away gel and loosened hair in the shower afterwards.

However, before you buy anything, remember to carefully go through all the product reviews available on each item.



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Sunday, July 22, 2012

Wholesale Sterling Silver Jewelry - Start Your Own Business

Shopping for wholesale sterling silver jewelry is one good way to save cash rather than buying few pieces. Mostly women who live and breathe fashion do this in order to get big savings. Trends constantly change in different parts of the world. Those who don't want to be left out in fashion do spent a lot of money to follow these trends. How do they manage to be in look stylish without breaking the bank? Smart fashionistas go for replicas, designer inspired and celebrity inspired jewels which are cheaper alternative for genuine jewelry. There is no need to spend thousands of dollars for a single piece.

Women have this fascination for sparkling jewelry. Who doesn't want to glitter like the stars up in the heavens? This is the reason why they subscribe to different fashion magazines and watch fashion channels to see the latest trends. Celebrities, musicians and royalties often wear the most glamorous jewels and they inspire ordinary people to follow the same trend. But these lavish jewels that they wore costs a fortune. It would be impossible for average Jane to have the same jewelry. This is reason why there are a ton of e-commerce sites that sell silver rings, necklaces, anklets, bracelets and replica jewelry patterned from the most up-to-date jewelry sported by influential people like celebrities. Crafted from .925 sterling silver and adorned with freshwater pearls, cubic zirconia stones, gemstones and crystals. Some are not keen to wear it and they purchase it to show generosity and give it as a gift for friends and loved ones. For bulk orders and to save money, it is highly advised to shop for wholesale sterling silver jewelry.

Would you be interested to start a jewelry business? If yes, then it's time to do business. For those who have limited budget, seek for a silver supplier who can provide low cost silver jewelry. Bulk orders are priced much cheaper. Look for wholesalers who have low minimum requirement. Before engaging in this line of business, make sure that you deal only with reputable and established suppliers. Check the quality and prices. Select trendy pieces with different colors, styles, and designs. Go for celebrity inspired and movie inspired jewels. These fashion forward pieces are selling like hotcakes. Offer a wide selection of jewelry with different sizes. Customers get excited with abundant choices, let them indulge in fine jewelry but priced reasonably. Start your own business today and start the hunt for wholesale sterling silver jewelry supplier.

Friday, July 20, 2012

Bridal Shower Themes

Legend has it that in Holland a parent of the bride refused to give the traditional dowry for his daughter because he disapproved of the gentleman she was marrying. He believed the young man wasn't worthy of his daughter and was below their financial class. In assistance, the bride's friends threw her an event and showered her with presents to come up with the dowry.

Whether or not this legend is valid, it's still a fun story to hear. Just like bridal showers that have shifted its intention from being a dowry-raising get together to providing the bride the time of her life prior to getting married.

It's normally the role of the maid of honor and bridesmaids to create a concept for the bridal shower. But actually, anyone can throw this party for the bride and also as many as they want. From the outdated and tired bridal shower at home while plying the bride with presents, here are a few quirky styles to charm the wife-to-be.

A Trip To Bridal Shower

That's where the bridal shower becomes an overnight or weekend getaway someplace. As of late the favorite destination is Las Vegas where all the ladies allow their hair down. Some bridal showers are positioned by the beach. However sometimes it can just be a day excursion someplace like a spa town or wine-tasting in a winery. For the people with budget, several bridal showers are spent out of the country, like say Mexico or Canada or maybe even France.

Create Your Own Hobby Bridal Shower

Sometimes fun can also be educational. It doesn't usually have to be boozing and staying out in the early hours of the morning It can also be helpful like employing a chef during the day to instruct the bride to be and the girls how to make a specific dish, like say the groom's favorite entree. Or study arts and craft like sewing or cross-stitch. It may also be something sporty like understanding how to play golf or bowling. It's also possible to do a yoga bridal shower for a bride-to-be who may have become an aficionado of this eastern lifestyle.

Traditional

If you decide to maintain the occasion simple and throw it at your home, you may still find ways to make it exciting. As in the case of the traditional style where everybody sits round the living room while gifts are being handed out, this time you can include games to this get together. It's especially excellent as an ice breaker particularly if the gals don't know one another.

Jack and Jill

This is one more term for the couple shower, that's fast becoming a trend. There are couples who prefer throwing a bridal shower and bachelor's party in one, as a result they enjoy it jointly. Normally they don't refer to it as a shower any longer but simply dinner or cocktails with both the bride and groom's friends and family attending. It's usually for couples who like doing things together.

Bridal showers don't always have to go over the board. What is important is definitely the fun in it, the harmony it gives the bride and her friends, and of course a valued memory that the bride can bring with her through wedded life.



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I Have Never Been A Bridesmaid, and Other Gaps in My Life

I've never really fitted in. I quite like my own company, am happy to take in stray animals, regard it as important to pay my way, look after myself, and occasionally enjoy being a little quirky. So sometimes I get into trouble for having coloured stripes in my hair, wearing the wrong kind of tights with my dresses, wearing comfortable sandals rather than high heels when I know that we'll be walking some distance on a night out.

Occasionally though being different has provided some wry amusement. I remember going to a rather smart nightclub with a girlfriend. She was wearing an expensive, exclusive outfit whilst I had on an inexpensive summer dress. Three other girls were wearing the same outfit as my friend, which caused her some irritation.

For many young girls being a bridesmaid is as close to being a princess as you can get. Drifting along behind a bride, wearing a pretty dress, carrying flowers and having everyone gasp and say how gorgeous they are is as close to perfection as it's possible to be.

However, having never been a part of a girly crowd I've never been involved in the girls night out, hen party, wedding planning chain of events. Maybe it's because we moved a lot when I was young. I had to change schools several times and consequently start again, not always an easy thing to do.

Becoming a little more self-sufficient meant that I never joined the girls in the gang as they went en masse to the bathroom, or went shopping for clothes, or spent hours swopping make-up, getting ready for a night out.

I used to always go out on my own, sometimes arranging to meet people at the venue so that I could arrive and leave when it suited. I always enjoyed going on holiday alone; it was quite an adjustment when I got married and had to consider someone else's plans.

Consequently, I have never been a bridesmaid. I nearly was, once. A close colleague of my father's was engaged to be married and I remember her telling me that I was to be her bridesmaid. As an 8 year old child I was elated and regularly asked my father about the big day. It was only when my parents went to the church for the wedding without me that I finally accepted that it was not to be. I was heart-broken. My grandmother, who was baby-sitting for me and my siblings was clearly disgusted by the whole situation and took me to the church, armed with a box of confetti. It was never mentioned again.

These days I guess bridesmaids are synonymous with larger weddings. When I got married I had just the one bridesmaid, my younger sister, and that was because she was family. When she married there were no bridesmaids. Smaller weddings are less likely to include bridesmaids, or they will be restricted to younger family members.

Also it can be a more pleasant experience being a guest at a friend's wedding rather than a bridesmaid. Guests can sit and enjoy the day, relax, socialise and celebrate the wedding, rather than be under the spotlight as part of the main event. Most of the weddings I've attended have been as a guest, and as I've got older, I've certainly found that to be a far more pleasant option.

Another of the gaps in my life was never being picked for team sports at school. I remember squirming with dread at the prospect of team sports. The fear of being picked and then letting the side down was the stuff of nightmares. The humiliating prospect of dropping the ball, missing the shot, being too slow was awful.

Even as an adult playing a lunchtime friendly game of rounders on the office playing fields never seemed very friendly to me as the men used to shout and yell, determined to win. Far too scary and aggressive for my taste.

I much prefer going to the gym, joining classes, using the equipment and competing against myself. I'm happy to train hard and do my best, but I don't want to feel bad about myself or add pressure into the experience.

So, there you have it. Three glaring omissions, serious gaps in my life. I wonder, what are yours; can you relate to mine?



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Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Tubal Ligation Reversal Surgery Changes Lives

For many women having a tubal ligation was the best choice for them. And, as with all things in life, circumstances can change and the decision is regretted. Some women that have had their tubes tied will decide it was not the right thing for them to do. Over time they may begin to try to find ways to have the procedure "undone" because they would like another child.

As time goes on and they begin talking to those in the medical community, the couple is usually told to look into IVF. Although IVF does and will help many people, not all couples can afford the expense. In this day and age the economy is struggling and many just do not have the extra cash to pay out. With IVF being so expensive and no guarantee of pregnancy, many couples have to pass on this option.

Tubal reversal surgery is a surgery where the fallopian tubes are repaired. A reversal surgeon will remove the damaged part of the fallopian tubes and then reattach the healthy remaining parts. This surgery will allow the couple to conceive in the most natural way possible. Reversal surgery has benefits over in vitro fertilization in a number of ways. First, the cost of tubal reversal surgery by the leading surgeons is about $7,000. There are no added drugs as used in IVF which can be extremely taxing on the woman's body. Another great plus with this surgery is that the couple can have as many children as they desire without added medical intervention. Of course, when the couple feels their family is completed they will have to use a form of birth control.

Reversal surgery can be performed as an outpatient procedure. Having the surgery performed as an outpatient procedure is safer due to not being exposed to sick patients. The cost of outpatient reversal surgery is less expensive because there are no added hospital expenses. With this type of surgery the patient is allowed to go back home the day after surgery. A member of the tubal reversal staff will examine the patient and once this is finished the patient and her adult companion are then able to leave the hotel.

The recuperation time following outpatient reversal is usually minimal. Most patients are feeling good a few days following the surgery. There are restrictions such as no heavy lifting. Patients who did not try to do too much immediately following surgery reported better recuperation times. As we all know, many of us try to push things too fast and the healing process can take longer.

As seen the Tubal Reversal Pregnancy Report 2009, tubal reversal actually has a better pregnancy rate following tubal ligation over IVF. With over 5000 patients being closely followed and reporting pregnancies, this is the largest tubal reversal study conducted to date.

Reversal surgery has changed the lives of thousands of couples. The surgery and advancements being made all the time has helped many couples become parents again following tubal ligation.



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Learn How to Measure Your Bra Size

Women everywhere complain about their bras pinching, sagging or being too tight. These are all signs that they are not wearing the right size of brassiere. Are you one of these women? If you are, then you need to know how to measure the right bra size for your body.

Once you know how to properly do this, then you can find the perfect bra size for your breasts. The band will no longer dig into your ribs and your breasts will fit better into the cups. Wearing your favorite bra style will no longer be a problem. In addition, your figure will be improved with the proper brassiere size.

Fitting Guide for All Bra Types

How to Take the Required Measurements for the Band and Bust
When measuring your bust for which bra size right for you, you need to use a cloth measuring tape. You may also get a close friend to help you, because it is a bit tricky to take your measurements yourself.

Wear your best fitting brassiere for these measurements. Adjust the straps so your breasts are not sagging. The tip of them should be even with the middle of your upper arms.

The first measurement to figure the size of your bra is taken around the underneath of the breasts and around to straight across the back to the starting point. Make sure to exhale completely and have your helper pull the measuring tape snug; but not too tight. You need to round this figure up to the next whole number and add one inch for odd numbers for bra sizes only come in even numbers.

Now to double check the above figure, take a measurement right under your armpits around your back and above your breasts. Again, round the number up to the next even number. Both measurements should match. This is the band part of the bra size.

The third measurement you take loosely around the fullest part of the bust. Starting in the middle of the front go around to the back and make sure the measuring tape goes straight across the back and meet back in the middle of the front. Take this measurement and subtract the band size from it. The resulting number will determine the cup size, as we will discuss next. It takes both the band and cup together to figure the correct bra size.

Cup Size

As discussed above the difference between the band and bust measurements determines the cup size. Examples of measurement differences in relation to US cup sizes are listed below:

  • 1" or less - AA cup
  • 1" - A cup
  • 2" - B cup
  • 3" - C cup
  • 4" - D cup
  • 5" - DD or E cup (manufacturers differ on their cup designation with some cup sizes)
  • 6" - DDD or F cup
  • 7" - DDDD or G cup
  • 8" - DDDDD or H cup
  • 9" - DDDDDD or I cup
  • 10" - J cup
  • 11" - K cup
  • 12" - L cup
  • 13" - M cup
  • 14" - N cup

Manufacturers of bra sizes can vary in fit and comfort. You may have to try different brands to find the perfect bra for you. Also, European and UK sizing is a bit different then the US sizing, so know which type of sizing is being used. Most brassieres are clearly marked. There are many bra styles and we are discussing some of them next.

Various Bra Types
Various bra styles are available for purchase today. The style that is right for your best friend might not be right for you. Check out the descriptions below to help decide on what type of bra you will purchase next:

Full figure styles are meant for women with larger breasts. These have some padding on the underneath of the cup for support and at times have padded straps for more comfortable wear. The closures are made with three to four rows of eyes and hooks. This style can come in both underwire and wire-free models.

Minimizer styles position the breast in such a way as to make them appear smaller than they are. Some women with large breasts like this rather than the bras that make their bust line stand out more.

Average figure bras typically have narrow straps, the sides and back and the closures have two rows of hooks and eyes. These provide moderate support. If you breasts are not large, these bras will work fine.

Underwire bras come in a variety of styles and have wires or plastic ribs underneath each cup for added support. Some models are more comfortable than other ones. These are effective at supporting even heavy breasts.

Strapless bras provide the support without the use of straps. Proper bra size in these is crucial for them to work effectively.

Pushup bras give a little extra ump to breast. These can even take drooping breast a lift. This will accentuate the bust line and often allow the breasts to be seen a bit depending on how low cut the outer garment is.

You will have to decide which of the bra types is right for you shape and need. When you are dressed up, you may wear a different style then when you are lounging about the house. The correct bra size is equally important in either circumstance.

Benefits from Wearing the Correct Brassiere Size
You will see many benefits from buying the right size of bra. If your old bra was too tight, you could find you breathe easier with your new one that fits right. Also, you will not have the band painfully digging into your ribs. With your breast better contained within a bra, it could not only accentuate your bust, it could also make your waist appear smaller.

Over the years, breasts can sag and the proper bra size can prolong some of this from happening. This is probably the most important benefit from proper brassiere sizing. Your clothes will hang better on your body if your breasts are not bulging out in inappropriate places because your bra is too small.

Taking all this information into consideration you can see why it is important to know how to measure your bra size. You will look and feel more comfortable, along with safeguarding your breasts against premature sagging. Double check what size you need today!



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No Pie For You!

Is there something in your heart you just know? You don't want it to be true and you don't talk about it, but you know it isn't going anywhere. Eventually you'll have to face it.

I must be true to myself and let the rest go. Believe in Love, Faith and Grace. The three of them are all that keep me going some days. Being human ain't for the faint of heart ya'll! Sometimes it actually sucks to be me and I want to live the life of one of my dogs! I want to sleep when I want, eat when I want and chew on things... how simple life would be! Unfortunately, I'm not a dog (bubbie) and I have responsibilities to live up to the expectations of life and God...

No stress there! There's something to be said for having a strong support system, for having faith and love and hope in your life. But I know there are times it doesn't feel like any of those things are there anymore. When even chocolate can't help, you have what my friend S calls, 'no pie.'

Translated, you got nothing left 'sista' - you're tapped out and have nothing left to give to anyone. It's time to recharge your faith, hope and love and get YOU back. In other words, bake a new pie or worst case scenario, go buy a new pie plate and start over.

"I have no pie left." I've used that metaphor so many times over the last 10 years that I just assume all around me understand it. It's a really quick way to tell your friends that you're in a bad place, that you just need to kvetch or complain or just get it out.

Now the whole 'pie thing' can be used in many ways; here are a few broken down for you:

1. I need to go buy a pie - meaning - I'm done. I need to start over and just get a fresh perspective.

2. I feel like a chocolate cream pie this weekend - meaning - I'm going to reset this weekend and 'eat some pie' - get a fresh perspective and just chill. (Note the more toppings you add to the pie, the more you're going to just let go - chocolate cream pie with whipped cream and chocolate shavings means a REALLY checked out relaxed weekend.)

3. I have no pie left - Meaning- just leave me alone right now. I need to bake. (In my mind, that's not metaphorical!):o)

4. He ate all my pie - Meaning - that loser just sucked the life right out of me!

5. No pie for you! - Meaning - I don't have anything nice to say so just leave me be!

See how well that works! S is just brilliant isn't she? Maybe all of us can get into the whole metaphor and use it as a nicer way to say 'give me some time to let me get ME back and retain my sanity!' Maybe then we'll have time to deal with the stuff that's stuck in our hearts and just let it go...

I wish you all full pie plates with ice cream a la mode!



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Monday, July 16, 2012

The Five Stages of Aging Grief

As another birthday approaches I am conducting my traditional 'take stock of my life' assessment. For the most part things are going well. I have an amazing husband, a loving and supportive family, and a group of awesome, imaginary friends. I have a roof over my head, a car that works, and a subscription to The National Geographic. I may not be rich but I'm not poor either... in fact it's probably been far too long since I've missed a meal. And when someone asks me what I do for a living, I now say "I'm a writer" without apologizing first. I realize, for the most part, that I'm a lucky woman.

Of course, I can't stop there, with the counting of blessings. That wouldn't be me. There is more to taking stock of what I have. There is also taking stock of what I lost. So every year I trudge down the hall, enter the bathroom, and confront the 'mirror of truth' for my annual physical evaluation.

Who is this person, I wonder, as I gaze bleary-eyed at my reflection. It sort of looks like me but the coloring is off. The chin is doughy and there are lines where there used to be smoothness. Actually, it kind of resembles... no... Oh shit!

I start applying stuff: lotions, conditioners, putty, anything to de-line and de-dough. Just a little fix to get me through the next 365 days. I check my notebook, the same notebook I've used every year to chart the progress. Every new line, vein, and divet is recorded and it seems there is a steady upward slope of crap coming my way that is exponentially increasing. Gray hairs that have been creeping in are staying and bringing friends. The property value on this scalp is going to tank. My eyes are so puffy and dark it looks like I haven't slept in 22 days, up 3 days from last year. And my knees, the cruel pranksters, allow me to squat down but not get back up. Maybe it's time to consider getting a Life Alert. I write it all in my notebook and punctuate it with a sad-faced period. The end is nigh.

Another birthday means saying hello to some things: wisdom, new opportunities, and 10% discounts at fine, major retail stores across the country. But it also means saying goodbye to other things, like the body parts I've long held dear. Years ago I made the decision that I would age gracefully and not become one of the Botox monsters I've seen on reality TV. But that doesn't mean I won't lament my losses. And in the spirit of dealing with things the way I've always dealt with things (by bitching about them on paper) I've come up with the Five Stages of Aging Grief:

Denial: I'm not getting older; I'm advancing into my future. That isn't a wrinkle on my brow; it's a sleep crease. My butt isn't drooping; my legs are extending. My gums aren't receding; my teeth are growing. I'm not losing my mind; I've developed Adult Onset ADD. When I look in the mirror I don't see my mother staring back at me, I see... Oh Shit!

Anger: Oh, cruel Universe! Why hast thou forsaken me!? One morning I'm young and nubile, frolicking in the park and the next minute I'm dragging my bat-winged arms and I can't remember why I'm even in the park. And the hair. Why did you give me long, thick hair just to scraggle it up, thin it out, and make it an entirely new color!? I don't think you're very funny! I want no more of it! I'm out of here!

Bargaining: Universe, I'm sorry about that last rant. Hormones. You should know. You gave them to me. I'm taking supplements now. I do have one small favor to ask. Please don't take the boobs... anything but the boobs.

Depression: Why did you have to take the boobs? There's nothing left for me here. I might as well eat a bucket of ice cream and retire to the couch to watch Hoarders and Lifetime Television until I'm dead. The remote controller is too heavy to lift anymore. Do they really have to air Latrisse and Depends commercials every five minutes?

Acceptance: Lifetime Television's not so bad. As a matter of fact, Desperate Housewives is starting to make sense. Lynette really did face some obstacles in trying to get back into the work force at her age. You go girl! And look at Madonna. Still doing cartwheels at 80. Hope she's got on her Depends. And actually, now that I think about it, my mother isn't so bad. Sure she might have a few wrinkles but she can also do a mean downward dog in Yoga class. And she does have all of her hair, even if she dyes it purple. Maybe this year won't be so bad after all.

And with that I settle into another year. Time to saddle up, sling the ole boobs over my shoulder, and ride off into the sunset. Who needs young and nubile? I'm going for old and crazy.



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Friday, July 13, 2012

Pashmina / Cashmere Shawls

Let us talk about what is a Pashmina or a Cashmere shawl? Or for that matter what does the word 'shawl' mean?

The word 'shawl' has different similar sounding terms in different languages e.g. in French, it is 'chale', in German, it is called 'schall' and in Italian, it is termed 'scialle' - all essentially meaning a square or a rectangular wrap, big enough to be draped around the shoulder, what is also commonly known as the 'shoulder-mantle'.

When we say Pashmina or a Cashmere shawls, we are referring to the shawls spun out of the fine yarns made with fibers sourced from the discarded undercoats of Tibetan or Changthangi goats. They are also commonly known as 'changra' goats, which are found in the high altitude mountain ranges of these regions. The other known breeds, used to source pashmina/cashmere fibers are of Orenburg goats and Mongolian goats.Two main determinants of the quality in pashmina/cashmere are the fiber diameter and the staple length. For good quality, the manufacturers purchase material between 13 - 20 microns. To let you make a comparison, a human hair has a diameter of around 70 microns. When these fine fibers are spun into thread, a multitude of microscopic air-pockets are formed; it is these that give the material its extraordinary warmth and softness.It would be interesting to note that until well into the 19th century, when the ladies shawl became a high fashion item in the west, there had been similar products in use. According to pashmina shawl historian Moorcroft, there existed 'do-shala'... long shoulder-mantles woven in pairs. These were used by noblemen of the times.

The do-shala shawl, often woven so cleverly that it is difficult to say that it has been joined/stitched together seam to seam!

Then there were 'qasaba' or 'rumal', large squares for women's wear.

Also, there were 'shamla' or 'cummerbunds', girdles for the waist, worn by Asiatics.

The modern term 'jamawar' popularly used in shawls today, originated from a particular type of all over design, which were tailored into 'jama', or various over-garments, worn by men e.g. - 'choga', 'angarkha', 'atamsukh'.

So the art of weaving a pashmina/cashmere shawl or a more popular stole or scarf, dates back to many centuries. In old times, it had various avatars e.g.'rumal', 'jama', 'doshala','cummerbund'. But the art of weaving a shawl/stole is still preserved in its original form when it is hand spun and hand woven. Though now-a-days, it is woven on power looms also. The art of adornment in the form of hand embroidery is still as painstakingly done, as in yore. The special embroidery technique of 'kani' is also being recognised today for its beauty and precision... though its design /talim is being computerised now... the actual work is still being done by hand.



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I Have Hope in My Heart

Have you ever been to a fertility clinic? I hope not. I have and they aren't fun. Fertility clinics are places where women of all ages, race, size and religion flock to in order to conceive a child. Infertility is a taboo subject in our American culture for some reason. I'll never understand that. I've been very open about our quest to have a child and have never hidden the truth.

Obviously, we don't have kids, so either people assume we don't want any or I tell them the truth. It's so much easier to put the truth out there - people have active imaginations and often their guesses are so hurtful. So, why not be honest? I had so many surgeries in the last 10 years of my life that I just never was able to try to have kids. Now, I'm 45 years old and healthy(finally) - and still no kids. Basically, I'm old. B & I didn't get married until I was 35 - so I started out late in the game and my body (and God) had other plans.

Even though I've had roadblocks, I'm not one of those people who will just sit back and say, oh well, guess we can't have children. I've fought hard with every iota of my being for us to be able to have a child. I've changed my diet to the point where I don't recognize my eating habits. I haven't had caffeine in 3 years and soda is but a distant memory.

I've made any sacrifice asked of me because it's just that important. I've missed vacations, family events and cried my way through conference calls just to get through the day at work. But it's all worth it you see. I really want this.

Over the years, I've had to be my own health care advocate. I've learned to ask, push and question. Once I've built up trust with a physician, I absolutely follow their advice, but I still question when things don't quite seem right for me. ME. I've learned that science is a guideline and no two humans are alike (except for identical twins:o) of course.) Many treatments that have worked well for other people don't work for me! In fact, typical protocols for fertility treatments just don't work. I have an amazing doctor who listens though and experiments with me and we've gotten great results. Her nursing team's skill and compassion is un-matched and their support has helped me down this really complicated path we're on.

The one dangling participle, or missing link to this ever important fertility chain is God. I know that no matter HOW HARD I try and how well I follow my diet and how diligent I am with taking my meds, I still might not get pregnant. That breaks my heart to type, let alone say out loud. I've faced that fact and have come to terms with it. Sort of. I still have hope in my heart.

I'm typing this now because we're at our last attempt. We've tried everything there is and even things you've never heard of and so far no kids. I've prayed so hard that I cry just thinking about it. I've found saints to pray to that I never knew existed and I've had to have faith that if it's in God's plan for me, it will be so. If not, I'll have to let it go and move on with my life. I know some of you are asking - why not adopt? Well we did. A traditional adoption would be very complicated for me with my health history and we were advised against it. So we did a very different kind of adoption - and that's what we're waiting on now.

Time will tell. God has always provided for me - I'm only here because of His grace - I get this. I just wish someone could call Him and explain that we'll be great parents - if He only gives us a chance.

Until we know more - prayers would be great. And please, remember that if someone doesn't have kids, it might not be because they didn't want them. God just had other plans for them. But don't treat them like they have a disease - they still love kids and would love to be happy for you and celebrate your pregnancies and joys. Your heart hurts inside, but if you want kids, you love them and any kids are a joy to be around.

So tonight, after you pray for all of the couples struggling with infertility, hug your kids and realize how truly blessed you are - even if they drew all over the walls in permanent marker or dumped a 5 lb bag of flour on the floor... they are a gift.



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Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Work Life Balance Tips for Working Mothers

A working mother cannot be dubbed for anything less than Wonder Woman herself. So, imagine how a couple of work life balance tips would empower the whole brigade of working mothers.

Working moms have a herculean task at their hand of handling work and family life simultaneously. These super moms often need some work life balance tips to manage overwhelming situations.

Here are some work life balance tips for working mothers:

  • Hold Yourself Together- The pressure of meeting deadlines and working on presentations will always remain the same. Don't go crazy thinking how you'll manage the work at home and at the office side-by-side. Relax and think about some ways you can vent out this stress. After a rough night of finishing pending files and washing the dishes all by yourself, treat yourself to some nice morning coffee and spend some time sitting in the balcony or maybe pick up that book which you always wanted for some time now.

  • Be Organized- Keep a record of the official things that you wish to finish off by the weekend and sort them out on a priority basis. In this manner, the most important things will be done well within time. Handle the family needs in the same manner. To make things clear, write down the things-to-do for the week on the family whiteboard.

  • Feel Free to Ask for Help- There's no pride in being seen as a super mom if you're suffering because you have too much on your plate. There are times when things can go haywire and you could really use another pair of hands. Don't shy away from asking for your husband's help with dinner or watching the children when you come exhausted from work.

  • Know Your Options- These days many companies who allow their employees to work from home. Working mothers should make full use of such options. This way you can spend more time with your family and work within the comforts of your home. It's a win-win situation if you're able to prioritize what to do and when to do. However, you can face trouble concentrating on the job if your children are running around.

  • Make Time- If you really wish to spend more time with your family, you'll have to make time. So, instead of yapping away about your boss's new personal assistant with your colleagues, have your lunch at your desk. This way you'll get more work done and leave early for home.

  • Learn to live with the Guilt- There will be those days when you have to miss your daughter's ballet show or reach late for the family dinner. But these are some of these things that you'll have to learn to let go. There are some things you have to sacrifice to provide a better lifestyle for your family and you.

Hope these work life balance tips help working moms to reduce stress and spend more time with their family.



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Colour and Dressing Hints for Professional Photos

Oh no! It is time to have some professional photos taken. These words can bring dread to your heart especially if your last lot of photos did not live up to your expectations.

I have had my share of good and bad professional family and business photos. The good ones hang happily on the wall or are on the web. The bad ones are hidden away or deleted. Unfortunately I have seen other people's family and business photos that also need to be hidden away but are not.

The better professional photographers give pre-photo advice on your setting and your poses so that you feel comfortable and relaxed. It is rare to get dressing advice for a photo shoot.

Clothes can make or break a photo. A great photo has three elements - setting, pose and clothes.

Here are my tips to help you get the dressing element of professional photos right for you.

Family Photos

The best and most interesting family photos have harmony and contrast. Let me explain.

Harmony and contrast are created through colour and style.

When you clothing is in harmony it draws people's attention to the faces and personality of the subjects. Have a discussion with your partner or family to choose a colour. White is popular but it does not suit everyone. Blue is second favourite as most family members have a shade of blue in their wardrobe. Ignore the skin-tone colours of beige, apricot or brown as you can appear naked in the photo as happened to a very upset acquaintance of mine. Co-ordinate colours below your waist especially if full-length photos are to be taken. Blue jeans fit the bill perfectly.

Next look at clothing styles. Everyone in a centre-buttoned shirt or V or round necked tee shirts or tops will create family harmony. Patterns may be different but make sure they blend not clash with each other.

Contrast creates a focal point. Put your only child in a textured top or a different style to everyone else. A mother or father wearing the theme colour plus another colour draws your attention to them. Everyone in white with mum wearing coloured or textured jewellery also creates a contrasting focus.

Business Photos

A business photo needs to show your personality and draw people to you.

Wear colours that focus attention on your face and eyes. That is easy if you have had your colours done and know what your complimentary, contrasting and signature colours are. You also need to be photographed against a plain or natural background colour that enhances you not merges or clashes with what you are wearing.

Your choice of clothing and accessories need to appeal to the type of clients that you and your business want to work with. Will you attract corporate clients, soft gentle clients, achieving go-getters or quirky artistic types? You clothing can show that as long you feel comfortable with that unspoken impression.

Be aware that photos will be cropped and shrunk for promotional material. I have had business photos that looked fantastic in full-screen but I faded away in the smaller version.

Special Occasion

For wedding photos you want to be your best but not overshadow the bride. Talk to all involved. This is a day for a perfectly fitted outfit. In the dressing room, stand far away from the mirror. Some colours may merge together or fade. Some can make you look naked. Some dress features can dominate the outfit. Choose a colour shade that suits you and a style that reflects your true personality. Your joy or your discomfort will be there for all to see.

For award dressing, it is your time to shine. Do the same dressing room mirror checks or have your photo taken in the clothes before the event so that you can make adjustments or changes. If dresses have a solid colour background with a contrasting colour design feature, make sure the feature lengthens not widens you.

Last Words

Your photographer will help you get your setting and pose right. There is more to dressing for professional photos but this article is a start towards creating your best professional photos so far.



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Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Bringing Back Handmade - Are We Now Seeing the Appeal?

What has happened to our handmade culture? There have been many TV shows recently showcasing British talent, real handmade manufacturing done right here on our own soil, going back to something we appear to have left behind.

The biggest key change in our culture over recent years is wanting something for nothing. We are a nation willing to sacrifice quality for price. Our demand has increased, we want things "now" and at exceptionally low costs.

But are we also a changing culture? With the real love for Vintage fashions and accessorising, we have begun to recognise that in fact quality is worth a lot more and the days of real manufacturing should no longer be a thing of the past?

Recent TV personalities such as Mary Portas have certainly made a case for this. Mary's most recent TV show (The Bottom Line) aimed at kick starting the British manufacturing industry again, promoting home manufacturing rather than outsourcing and mass producing. She explains that this isn't about paying over the odds for goods, it is just anti the cheap products that compromises ethics, quality and values, "You know what the truth of this is: stop being so greedy. It's greed and gain that got us into the state this country's in today".

As a consumer we are seeing an increased awareness that perhaps cheaper mass produced products come at a cost. Consumers are now leaning towards quality goods, knowing that this is what we as a nation deserve and should strive for.

But how do we go about purchasing unique hand made products? It is true to say that finding little boutiques on the average high street is increasingly difficult. So how do we live out this ideal? It is a fact that online shopping is big news in the UK and gaining in popularity. With this shift in our purchasing habits we have been graced with some great websites where consumers are able to purchase such goods direct from the designers and hobby crafters (such as Etsy.com and Folksy.com).

A real trend has also seen the popularity of second hand shops particularly those that promote vintage style. This has really helped boost interest in an era of elegance and quality.

The popularity for vintage style has most certainly grown over recent years. More and more individuals are seeking an alternative way of defining their style and culture. Pushing the boundaries and taking their images back into "vintage decades" they think best reflect them.

The wedding stationery industry is also starting to realise this and where once there were very bland mass produced cards, there now seems to be a demand for something unique, something that reflects the couples style and individualism. Couples want to wow their guests announcing their wedding with style, making theirs stand out from the rest.

Again, the term "vintage" has been a great boost for this industry as more and more designers are beginning to realise that there is more to wedding stationery than just a printed piece of card.

Slowly we are beginning to see wedding stationery evolve into handmade products, where designers use elegant touches such as vintage styled jewelled embellishments, buttons, lace and pearls.

Our passion for an era gone-by has been a great boost to the design industry showcasing British talent and style, encouraging handmade luxury.

But will this passion be enough to take on the mass produced industry? Even if a new fad kicks in and the image of Vintage begins to fade for some, I would like to think that it has at least opened a gateway to peoples understanding of quality and beauty. The hope is that we encourage and promote the growth of handmade products. We should view such products as a way of growing our sense of individualism and reflecting our style in a way that mass produced goods just can't do.



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Are You Pinning Yet?

Images are everywhere. How many times has an image grabbed your attention and you just can't wait to share it with others?

Now you have an easy way to share all these images and videos with just a click of the mouse. At Pinterest, you can share the things you love with your friends and family by creating virtual boards. Pinning is addictive, is fun, is something anyone can do, and should do.

Who is pinning? Everyone, creating virtual pinboards spark the imagination, spread the things you love, and supercharge your creativity.

Why should you pin? First, it engages people and they stick around you more. Second, it allows everyone one a peek into the personal side of a pinner. Third, people share your pins, which get you more exposure, if that's what you are looking for.

How do you get to pinning? At Pinterest, you must request an invite to join the "pinning society." If you have a friend who has already gained entrance, they can send you an invite from the inside. Getting an invite from the inside or out doesn't take long, about 24-48 hours. When you do get your invite, and you will, you will start pinning within minutes.

When you get your invite, what do you do? Setting up your account is a three-step process, which Pinterest walks you through. You'll choose your interests. Next, Pinterest will suggest people for you to follow. Finally, you will create a board, and start pinning.

What are these boards? Once you have created an account you will set up your first board. The board should have a narrow focus. Start with a board on food, clothes, jewelry, toys, color, or your hobby. The board should only focus on one type of item. You can make many boards so don't clutter up one with all the foods you love. Create a board on each type of food you love.

Where do I find images? Images are all around the web. Most images are OK to use without concern, but do be cautious about copyright. Many sites today are "Pin friendly" they will have a "pin it" button somewhere on the site. When you click the button it will bring up all the images from the site, you choose the image you want to pin, and then you go back to Pinterest to pin on a board of your choice.

One of the most important things about pinning on Pinterest is to "repin, like, and comment." When you do one of these things, you are providing social approval to the board and board maker. It feels great to get noticed, and if enough of your pins get repined, commented on or liked your board might show up in the popularity boards for the world to see.



This article is sponsored by medical case study.

Monday, July 9, 2012

Evening And Formal Wear Recommendations For Black-Tie Events

It's hard to dress yourself up during a formal event and secure that "wow" factor when you walk into the room. Unlike celebrities who have personal stylists and access to the latest and most expensive evening wear, you have to make do with what your resources allow you to have. Nevertheless, it is not impossible to exude a certain level of elegance during a ball or formal function, even with a tight budget. All you have to do is choose the right kind of dress for you and find a boutique that has an extensive collection of evening and formal wear.

What you want to do is secure a few long gown choices as black-tie events usually call for their use. It's up to you whether or not you'd like to keep things simple with an all-black or grey selection or add a little bit of color into the mix. If you are feeling slightly more adventurous, prints are widely popular this year along with tailored silhouettes. But try not to lean towards shocking as it may force you to stand out in an awkward way. Steer clear of clothes that are too revealing since that would be inappropriate for the said event. If you'd like to secure some sex appeal with what you are donning, you can do so with asymmetrical shoulder straps, a tube top or a little peek-a-boo cut out in less sensitive parts of your body, like your back. You could also show a little of cleavage. But try not to be so overt because it may be misconstrued for tacky or trashy.

When shopping for an evening or formal wear, think more of classic beauty. But don't go so far as getting voluminous outfits with lots of pouf or those with long trains because that will only make you uncomfortable during the party. If you'd like something Victorian inspired, go for floor-length Empire cut dresses with a sleeve sewn shawl or a diamond brooch for effect.

Now, some of you may feel more comfortable wearing cocktail dresses to a black-tie event as they permit better movement. But you have to be careful about what you choose to put on. Remember that they are not standard garments for such occasions. So, at the very least, they should be well accessorized. If you are attending something fancy, you might want to keep them below the knee to maintain a certain level of classiness. And always see to it that aesthetics of your dress matches the theme established.

Don't even mistake the notion of evening and formal wear with work clothes. Not only will you embarrass yourself but also your date. And try not to wear a pant suit during the event, even if it is designer clothing. The last thing you want to do is put a damper to your femininity with a masculine ensemble.

If you still are having a hard time narrowing down you options through these tips, you could consult dress shops for the latest trends and styling recommendations. Or you could flip through magazines for samples and then show them to shop receptionists.

Evolution of Edwardian Fashion

Even though Edwardian fashion for women was cumbersome and restrictive, there can be no doubt that Edwardian women's clothing spawned some of the most elegant fashion in the history of female attire. However, in the advent of women's rights and the plights of the poor, it begs the question as to whether or not one should see Edwardian fashion for its beauty and grandeur while seeing women's fashion of this period as a simple veneer of beauty while remembering the fact that women's fashion of this period was very uncomfortable and were set according to male standards and ideals. The fashion of the period can be traced to the luxury of European society which had been made possible by the enslavement and subjugation of people around the world through colonialism and imperialism. The term Edwardian itself is very Ethnocentric, essentially labeling a time in world history according to the name of one King in England. There is no guilt in adoring such female beauty, but one must remember the context of the period and remember that life was not so glamorous for minorities, immigrants and the poor.

The grand extravagance came to an end at the beginning of World War One and the issue of the poor became a hot topic throughout European, intellectual circles. Because of the war effort and the highlight on those suffering in society, many elites chose not to flaunt such grand fashions in public and hence the grand fashions of old suddenly became unacceptable. From the 1920s onward, dress and fashion had become more subdued and tame. The 1920s also witnessed the women's movement for voting rights and more women were entering the workforce; therefore, the demand for practical and simplistic fashion grew popular because many women saw the fashions of their mothers and grandmothers as a repressive tool that was not practical for women and were tailored according to men's desires. A good example is the corset which was meant to exude the popular hourglass figure, a mostly male standard.

Grand fashion created a dream-life that many middle class women of the Victorian and Edwardian era had hoped to achieve. In today's society, it is easy for people in a post-modern world to sit back and gaze in awe of Edwardian fashion and there is nothing wrong with being attracted to such beauty. In a wider context, however, women who sported such royal fashions were very lucky given how tough life was for not only women of poorer classes, but people of different ethnicity around the world.



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Flat Iron Techniques That Produce Salon Quality Results

Typically when we think of a flat iron we think of only hair straightening. However, with the right technique a flat iron can also be used to flip and curl your hair. The key is to have a flat iron with plates that are as close to 1" inch as possible and if your hair is short then even smaller.

To begin you need to ensure that your flat iron is best suited for your hair type. If your hair is hard to straighten then a titanium product like the BabylissPro Nano Titanium might be the right choice. Alternatively, if your hair is finer and not as difficult to straighten then a tourmaline product may be the way to go. This however does not mean that you have to go out and buy a new flat iron if you already have one; instead try adjusting the heat with higher settings for thick hair and vice versa.

Next you need to apply a thermal heat styling product. This serves as a protective barrier between the hot plates and your hair. Without it you run the risk of damaging your hair, which can lead to drying and breakage. There are numerous products available so find one that you really like. If you are still looking then you might try the Miracle Leave-In product by 'It's a 10'. This is a great choice as it is a flat iron spray, thermal protector and stops breakage while adding shine.

Lastly before we get started a few important tips. You should never flat iron your hair when it is dirty. The best results come from freshly washed hair that is dry. Although, it does not make much difference whether you blow dry your hair or let it dry naturally. Yet, blow drying does have the risk of damaging your hair as well.

1. Hair Straightening

The first thing you need to do is brush or comb through your hair and then place it into sections. The easiest and fastest way is to grab the hair at the top of the head twist it around and place in a clip. Secondly, section across the upper part of your ears and again twist it around and place in a clip. This will leave all the hair from your ears down to the back of the neck out and ready for straightening. You should always start from the bottom working your way up so that you finish off with the top part of the head last.

Now comb through the section that is left out again. This is important because if there are tangles the hair will not be able to smoothly pass through the plates causing snagging and pulling. If your hair is very curly or frizzy you will need to comb each section prior to running the flat iron across it. Next grab a portion of the hair approximately 1" inch across and place the flat iron as close to the root as possible making sure that you do not burn your scalp. Generally, about a ¼ inch away from the scalp is best and try not to take too much hair through the flat iron at one time. Salon results come from smaller amounts of hair where each strand is able to glide evenly between the plates.

Now that you have a section of hair between the plates start pulling the flat iron through. You should not be squeezing the plates together really hard. The goal is to allow the hair to freely glide between the plates. If this is not happening you may have too much hair that you are trying to pull through at once - try dividing your section in half.

The next and most important part is the speed at which you are pulling the flat iron through your hair. If you are pulling too quickly you will not get the results that you want and if you are pulling too slowly you run the risk of damaging your hair. A good rule of thumb when you are first learning is to count out loud "one thousand one, one thousand two, one thousand three" and move the flat iron according to this speed. If your hair is extremely curly and harder to straighten then slow this speed down just a little. When you get to the end of the hair hold it just slightly longer. This will ensure that you get perfectly clean edges.

2. Flipping

Hair flipping, or sometimes referred to as flicking, is a great way to get some movement on the ends of the hair. Whether you flip the hair inward or outward does not change the technique only the rotation of the wrist.

To begin you follow all of the same steps as outlined in the straightening section. You want to ensure that you start at the root so that the rest of the hair is smooth and silky with the flip being only on the ends. Remember to pull through smaller sections and count out loud to maintain an adequate speed. When you get closer to the ends turn your wrist either inward or outward forcing the hair now to glide through the plates at an angle. Remember movement of the hair happens according to where the heated plates are; so the more you turn your wrist the stronger the flip.

The secret to a perfect flip is to slow the speed down slightly, while continuing to turn the wrist. The most important thing is to have continuous movement almost like you are walking through the hair, but don't let go of the tension between the plates at this will leave marks in the hair (they almost look like lines and you don't want that). The movement is steady with an even tension at a slow speed.

3. Curling

Curling the hair with a flat iron is probably the most difficult technique to master. However, once you get the hang of it you will see that it really isn't that hard. Again you will begin with the same steps as outlined in the straightening section. Then you need to decide where you would like to place the curls. Do you want tight curls starting from the top of the head or loose wavy curls that start about half way down. It is a good idea to begin at the root of the hair as this will ensure an overall polished look rather than just starting where you want the curl.

Section the hair as indicated previously taking approximately 1" inch and placing it in between the plates. Now when you want to begin the curl turn the flat iron either inward or outward, depending on the direction of the curl that you want, and start rolling it with the hair loosely around it. Remember you want the flat iron to be constantly moving so you are rolling it in the palm of your hand, while the hair is evenly going through the plates. The tighter you hold the hair and roll the flat iron the tighter the curls. Do not pull on the hair or hold it between the plates for a long period of time. If your hair is harder to curl you will need to hold it slightly longer, but not more than two seconds.

In closing, remember to always use a thermal protector on your hair. This is imperative to ensure that no damage is done during this process. Also, try to match the flat iron to your specific hair type or work with the heat setting to get optimal results. These techniques take a little bit of time to master, but once you get it you will have beautiful salon quality styles that last.



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