Victorian Society were loathed to accept a homosexual lifestyle; and believed it was an aberrant sexuality, which needed to be corrected or/and punished. Queen Victoria thought that the notion of a lesbian was something outside of the norm and preferred to think that this particular type of sexuality did not exist; and should certainly not be practised. Oscar Wilde, a well known playwright of the time, was actually incarcerated for sexual immorality. He referred to gay love as 'the love that dare not speak its name.(1)
In today's 21st Century gays and lesbians have 'come out' and openly share and practise their love for each other. Same sex relationships are not particularly frowned on, and seem less outside of the societal norm. Additionally the media tends to be less critical and public opinion seems less judgmental of this type of lifestyle. It might be argued that the radical shift in public opinion with regard to this type of lifestyle can be attributed to some extent to the willingness of gays and lesbians to openly discuss their lives and feelings. The increasingly popular 'Talk Shows' of the 90s have also been influential in encouraging others to appreciate that we all have a right to choose who we love and have a sexual relationship with.
There were and still are a multiplicity of television and radio talk shows which encourage open discussions on gay and lesbian lifestyles; and I would argue that in highlighting the subject matter it has become acceptable as part of the norm. This type of sexuality is seen as being quite common place, and is no longer perceived as being sexually deviant or unacceptable in contemporary society.
Furthermore it can be argued that stereotypes of gays and lesbians are less archetypal and the image of the 'butch' lesbian much less overt. It might in fact be said that previously there was a need to look different and so attract others of the same sex. This has altered somewhat as the media and society now accept the lesbian lifestyle as simply another way to love. Understanding it might be argued has given way to genuine acceptance of another lifestyle.
Recently while reading an article entitled Lesbian Life - What causes homosexuality (What makes someone Gay or Lesbian)-(2) I remember thinking it's almost as if it's perceived as a disease, something very undesirable and to be avoided at all costs. The premise of the article is to discuss whether there is a gay gene, as a possible explanation for the variance in our sexuality. If for instance you have the gay gene, then its inevitable that you would have a preference for your own sex. Essentially this illuminates the science versus religion debate. If our creator made us so that we have a preference for our own sex, then how can religious proponents condemn us, and say it's against biblical precepts for us to practise this lifestyle? It may be argued that this indicates that one's sexuality is not innate but environmental.
The article was also keen to explore our socialization, for instance did the subject become gay or lesbian because of some disparity in the child's upbringing; or was it caused by some trauma experienced in childhood or as a young person. The causes, reasons or factors for someone becoming a lesbian is briefly discussed in terms of it being a genetic condition. It suggests that our preferred sexual orientations is something we were born with, in much the same way as an inherited trait, like skin or hair colour.
So what makes you a lesbian, I'm not an authority on the subject nor do have I a wealth of experience on the subject. Basically, I'm speaking from the perspective of an observer, not a practitioner. On the basis of that I can only share my thoughts on the matter. Personally, I believe that you are not born gay, nor do I think it's inherited or in the genes so to speak. I believe that our sexuality is to a large extent based on personal choice. How far are our life choices determined by the society we live in; by our parenting and being a product of the environment in which we live? These and other questions should be given careful consideration when discussing our sexuality; it is I believe similar to assessing what determines our characters, personality and identity. Ultimately it is a personal choice we are making because after all we are conscious rational human beings able to make our own choices and decisions.
Veronica Williams
(1)'The Love that dare not speak its name' Oscar Wilde
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=The%20
(2)Lesbian Life http://lesbianlife.about.com/od/comingoutadvice/a/causes
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